It's springtime in Provo

The birds are chirping, the snow is melting from Timpanogos, and girls have pulled out that scandalous pair of capris that show a hint of calf muscle.  It can only mean one thing: spring has finally arrived in Happy Valley.  There are some definite perks to this season, one of which is that people are generally happier.  The other is that each passing day of sunshine means more and more students are slowly beginning to emerge from their winter nests (apartments) and into a sunshine filled haven.  So here's the equation so far: Springtime = Happy people beginning to remember life before hot chocolate and long johns.

As I've wandered through campus the past few days I've noticed an alarming trend.  There is an abundance of couples at BYU.  Can it be?  Is it true?  Can even more people be starting to date?  The answer, my dear friends, is yes.  But I'm glad to see that you were puzzled at the dating increase as well.  Where are these new couples coming from?  BYU already leads the nation in couples/marriages/creative dating stats.  And then it hit me.  The answer was starring at me like a band geek who forgot to get off the field before kick off.  Wait, that guy actually is a band geek.  And I wouldn't mind him looking at me if he wasn't also simultaneously kissing his girlfriend outside of the library.  

I forced the image of The World's Soggiest Kiss out of my mind and focused on the madness overtaking BYU's campus.  The culprit behind this new love craze?  Springtime.   I believe it's time for a disclaimer.  Lest I look like a bitter girl about to graduate BYU without an MRS degree, i should clarify that I am an avid supporter of love and dating.  That being said, the level of love on campus makes me want to throw up.  Springtime = Katie's breakfast on the sidewalk.   

Here's my gripe with Provo's pastime of procreation.  Most of the guys are running around excited to be doing something besides playing nintendo, so they ask out just about anything (including some very frightened statues).  Girls, being nice, and sometimes in need of a meal, say yes.  Before the week is over the two are a couple and proclaiming their mutual infatuation in the form of back rubs, neck rubs, and thigh grabbing during my classes.  I'm glad that lifelong band friends have finally taken the plunge into band lovers, but there's no need for me to see it. So, as a desperate plea to all awkward Provo couples, I ask you to keep your kissing/touching/groping to a minimum.  I should not have seen four people's tongues today in other people's mouths.  That will probably take weeks to recover from, so I hope your extended salutations were worth the trauma they inflicted.