HAPPY MARCH MADNESS EVERYONE!
So I had a brilliant idea today as I was walking to class. And I think I should pitch it to Hallmark and make millions of dollars off of it. So here's the idea: as many of you know, the end of March signals the beginning of spring and it is a time of hope, excitement, and dreaming. But no one cares about baby chikadees and wobbly-legged lambs when the country's elite collegiate athletes are competing in the NCAA basketball tournament. And these athletes carry with them the hopes and dreams of all the wanna-be collegiate athletes out there, all the accountants buried under W2 forms, all of the now slightly overweight blue collared workers that haven't touched a basketball in decades but continue to yell at the TV because they KNOW that they could have made that shot at the buzzer and ushered the team to the final four.Hallmark gets a bad reputation because it tends to capitalize on the female gender's desire for intimacy, sincerity, and frivolity. This reputation is perpetuated by the unfortunate males that are forced to purchase cards, boxes of chocolates, and teddy bears that wear shirts saying things like "i love you berry much!" Most men (certainly not all) do not like these things, and instead of taking girls out to a fancy vegan dinner, would much rather be at home eating buffalo wings and watching a game. But men continue to support this tradition with grumbling attitudes and the hope that some new red lingerie will be in their near future.
So why shouldn't Hallmark create a holiday that is devoted to allowing the women to show their love and appreciation to men. Why not support their love of sports and greasy food? And yet, somehow make it classy. A lot of girls I know do not like march madness because they feel left out, or feel that the men in their life would rather watch basketball than spend time with them. But if Hallmark could create a card saying something like "I simply go MAD for you in March" then girls could somehow get involved in this whole thing. Girls could, essentially, create a Valentine's day geared towards men. Instead of a teddy bear, why not give the man a pizza that comes in a box shaped like a basketball? This way, the girls dont feel left out, everyone gets to watch the tournament, and I make millions of dollars. Plus, I truly don't think we give guys enough credit for suffering through Valentine's day.
